Saturday, March 31, 2012

On Being a Special Needs Eater

By Kristen

Listen, it is time you face it. You are high maintenance. That's right, by choosing to be healthy you have in turn chosen to be difficult. Even so, you have made a good choice, as the Weston A Price Foundation says, "The wise will thrive." As your health improves you will find this to be true. However, at times it will not be easy. Here are some guidelines to ease your journey.

1. Only complain a little. Though being on this diet may seem essential to you and an integral part of healing, to others you have made a choice. Therefore your whining will not endear them to you, in fact it will make you look like a masochist. Just grin and bear it as you sip your bone broth and sit through the work catered lunch, chocolate fountain celebration, Dean and Deluca catered wedding, or trip to Charlie's Chocolate factory.

2. Find some support. This is imperative, as you can actually complain to these people! And they can whine to you! Additionally they will help you stay committed and will be a good source to share information with. Ideally you will find a real live person you can meet up with. You may want to check out your local Weston A. Price chapter, or see if there is a primal or paleo meetup in your area.  Many forums are filled with like minded cyber people. You can find forums on: Mark's Daily Apple, Cave Man Forum, Jack Kruse and many other paleo forums. There is also a GAPS Yahoo group. Once you find some HLHs (healthy living homies) you can obsessively discuss fermented food, your fave CSA, and chat about how your your leptin is totally resetting.

3. Lay low and don't try to convert people. I know I know, once you embark on this journey you will likely want to announce your findings to the world. DON'T GIVE IN. I am here to tell you that exactly zero people in the world want to be aggressively converted. In fact, it will likely make them resist any change. Instead just live the vida low carb. If they are interested I guarantee they will ask you questions, and maybe they will want to follow your lead. Remember, you can always talk to your HLHs.

4. Be Prepared. Bring what you need and do your research. otherwise you will find yourself at the airport drooling over some processed street meat oozing its pink slime juices over the roaster. You can save yourself a lot of misery by looking at restaurant menus online ahead of time and traveling with a Lara bar.

5. Be the hostess (or host) with the mostess. Let's be frank here, you have a lot of needs around food. It is not just a measly shellfish allergy or aversion to gefilte fish, you have some serious food requirements, so many requirements that one practically requires an advanced degree in order to understand them all.  Do not saddle your friends and family with this, instead host gatherings at your house or opt for potlucks in hopes that no one will notice that you are only eating the food you brought and some fruit salad. If someone REALLY wants to cook for you just tell them all you eat is meat, vegetables and fruit. Make sure you ask about the salad dressing.

5. Keep Learning. The more you know the more likely you are to stay on the wagon and remember why you made this crazy choice.

7. Stay Positive. Pretend you are on Iron Chef for life. It's fun! It's a challenge! It's so crispy yet delicate!

1 comment:

  1. This post is hilarious. I've been doing GAPS now for a century (actually it's been 16 mos) and just got back from the East Coast visiting my husbands family. This all rings so true and I sorta wish I had seen this before I went 'cause it has so many good reminders that I am just as crazy as I think I am, but I don't need to worry about it because.... so are you (and it's nice to know I am not the only sane/crazy person out here)!- Kath